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4 Elements to help you in finding your purpose

Unsplash - Purpose

Regardless of the quest to understand the purpose of life, we all come to a point in our life where we’re asking ourselves what the purpose of our own life is. What have I to share with the world? What is my unique reason of being?

We’re evaluating and striving for a profession that matches with our interests and skills. Maybe considering starting a family, with or without kids, and finding contentment in our decisions. If you're among those who are fortunate enough to be fully content with your choices, bear in mind that this isn't a reality for everyone.

I unconsciously have been struggling a long time with this, trying to find purpose in what I’m doing. This constant feel of being purposeless, or doing purposeless things, just kept feeding my depression.

We’re getting energy through goals. We set ourselves objectives that, when we achieve them, we experience a short burst of satisfaction and happiness. This can be this new car we always wanted. Or a promotion at work. Or whatever else. Unfortunately, if what we’re doing is in misalignment with our values, our purpose, it fades again shortly after.

Purpose keeps us motivated. It’s what keeps us going, waking up in the morning, ready to face and handle challenges. Every action we take requires energy and without the sense of purpose, we cannot source it.

Finding your own purpose isn’t an easy task. We’re trying to look at what exists in the world and evaluate how we can fit into it. While there’s nothing wrong with this, it hinders us from experiencing ourselves and come to what is already within us.

While following this approach, we set our focus on “role playing” and this drifts away from remaining authentic. Instead, I’ve come to approach it differently.

4 Elements to help you in finding your purpose

Start the other way around. Instead of seeking how you could fit into the world, start by getting to know yourself on a deeper level and evaluate how the world fits in with you.

  1. Become aware of your own values. Ask yourself what your values are and check them against how you currently live. Do you live in alignment with your values? This reflection is crucial and opens the path for change. Once you realize the areas where you live against your values, you gain a set of first steps to improve. This alone can bring a tremendous improvement to the way you feel.

  2. Unveil your nemesis! The best indicator of what brings you closer to your purpose is veiled by what you fear the most and admire at the same time; Your own nemesis! It sounds weird, but it’s true. Watch out for things you admire, but you’re scared of doing it yourself. This can be everything, like acrobatic artists, dancers, speakers, authors, teachers, musicians, whatever it is. Have a closer look at it, and if you feel this kind of excitement while it remains impossible to you… that’s a hint to follow. The devil is in the detail. It doesn’t necessarily mean that while you admire dancers, your purpose is to dance. But something within resonates in you. That’s where you should put your focus on.

  3. Look closer at your past journeys. There have never been bad decisions. There was always something for you to take out of it. As an example, I worked as a Software Developer, Business Analyst and Project Manager over the years. Despite my job draining my energy, I realized that my passion was in helping my colleagues. I helped to spread awareness across teams to better understand each other’s constraints and thus, facilitate communication, well-being and performance at work. This wasn’t part of my formal duties, but it was that element that kept me going; Helping others. This energizes me while running

  4. What do your friends say about you? Step out of your own perception. Ask your friends and family where they see your strengths. Where and when did they observe you developing enthusiasm? We all know this phenomenon. We’re blind about ourselves but see clearly about others. Don’t underestimate this and make use of it.

It’s important to give yourself sometime when reflecting on the above. Don’t reject something right away. Again, your purpose will probably frighten you at first. Take some time to feel into it. Distinguish between fear and excitement and insecurity. Remember that everything is a development. It’s a journey that takes time to flourish.

"Rome wasn't built in a day, but they were laying bricks every hour"

Once you found something that gives birth to enthusiasm, excitement, and frightens you at the same time; Don’t give up while settling in front of a seemingly impossible mission. Break it down to smaller steps you can start with to move in that direction.

It’s a journey. Let it develop naturally. Start with what you feel capable of right now. You will grow into what you estimate is impossible today as you move on.

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